It's been a long winter. Not enough loud music, definitely not enough social time. The outer darkness of American politics is ever-more-grim and I have an unsettling idea that I'm not going to slide peacefully through the next two decades.
But I chatted with Lucy the other day as Eva and I plotted a new adventure to shoot a dead forest on the coast that has been on my bucket list for a long time. These shots are from a camping trip three years ago and I got to sit out in the waterfall and just giggle for a bit, a process I highly recommend.
Eva is a wonderful model and travel partner. She reminds me, still, in some ways, of my last serious relationship but the sheer terror of that has faded. She's a dear friend. Lucy on the other hand is one of the sweetest, strongest and stubbornest people I've ever met. I think she was recovering from a bout of Covid and had been sick through her last workshop. I would totally have understood if she just needed to take a week off but here she is climbing a mountain and standing in a freezing cold waterfall to get the shot. She's a badass. And did I mention that she's a sweetheart? I don't want to imagine her ANGRY but I also cannot make the leap to think what would cause her to lose her cool. She's just a genuinely nice human. And gifted with some serious physical beauty that she exercises in a variety of ways but I think she'd be beautiful even if she just lounged around in a housecoat and drank champagne from a shoe. LOL. She's a hottie.
I do wonder if my decade around these amazing women is skewing my perception of human beauty? No, probably not. I find certain people attractive because of who they ARE rather than any particular bit of T&A. I am still mildly smitten with Jess, tiny and screwy as she was. And with my ex Nicole, tall and handsome in a unique way. Kalah was more rounded on a small frame whereas Dana was just petite and matter-of-fact, like the engineer she is. Every woman who has really claimed my heart has done so on some particular bit of themselves. It's nice to keep a crush around but if there's no spark, well….there's no spark. I adore models like Lucy or Zoe or Eva but there is no spark that would make me think of anything more than a great friendship. Which is how it should be — if there's a spark it's a two-way street.